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Nasty Christians Need To Learn-promote yourself

I have always been shy to tell people I am a Christian because of the types of Christians we have nowadays. This poem sums up my feelings. Awesome!

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Baba God and Naijamum

Baba God: So do you still call yourself Naijamum?

Me: (Falling flat on my face) Yes sir, by Your grace sir.

Baba God: And why are you smiling all over the place?

Me: (Taken aback) How do you mean sir?

Baba God: You should be ashamed of yourself.

Me: (Yay, ‘mo gbe’ woe is me) How sir, why sir,

Baba God: You better go and do a change of name, you could call yourself either EUmum, or even any other Country in Africa, like Ghanamum, Kenyamum etc but not Naijamum.

Me: But why Baba mi, I am a Nigerian by your grace sir, You made me a Nigerian remember?

Baba God: Yes I agree, but you have failed woefully as a parent.

Me: (Wiping the smile off my face) Me? how sir, with all due respect sir. I am trying seriously sir.

Baba God: Uhmph. Look at you. All you do is go from one Owambe to the other. Look at all the children I gave you. 

Me: Which children sir, I cannot question You neither can I look You in the face, but which children sir?

Baba God: Look at Jona, Ebora, Stella, Aminu, Mohamodu….

Me: Oh, those ones .

Baba God: Yes those ones, are you not Naijamum, are they not your children?

Me: (Crestfallen) Yes they are sir.

Baba God: What have I not  done for you? I have made sure you lack nothing that is good, human resources , natural resources , good weather, all year round summer, good climate, no typhoons, no earthquake , no Tsunamis, no.. In fact where should I start? I have given your children good physique for sports, good brain to think, to advance their economy, to make their world better, in fact I so much love you and your children that I have made your country the new headquarters of  Christianity and the Gospel but it seems all your children are bent on doing is to lie, steal and cheat their other brothers and sisters.

source

Jona’s Masters Thesis

Look at Jona, when I gave him the opportunity to go to school, he went there to be drawing shrimps, It is not that I am  against his drawing shrimps after all shrimps were created by me and also he was surrounded by shrimps since Patty his wife was selling shrimps, but why should he come out and say he has a PHD when he does not? And you guys were wondering why he refused to sack Stella,  did n’t you know that Stella would have leaked his secret too if he had tried to sack her. 

House of Representatives, Abuja.

Legislators scaling fence at the House of Representatives Abuja.

As for Stella, she was spending the common wealth  to purchase bullet proof cars. Aminu that should respect himself has been changing political parties as if it is to protect the remaining children meanwhile, it is for his own selfish interest. He even had to scale fences in broad daylight in the full glare of every other of your children.

Eboraebora owu seems to be the worse of them all, he is a whistle blower and very vindictive, don’t be deceived by thinking that the actions he is taking is to protect your other children, no, it is to get back at Jona and to make sure he doesn’t get another chance at power, after all his own third term agenda was scuttled too. He has been disowned by even his own biological children and you are still sitting there, going on as if all is well. Mohamodu on his own part killed three of his siblings in cold blood with a retroactive law, I mean who does that? I have only barely forgiven him since then. Now he wants to come back into power armed with some dodgy school leaving certificate.buhari-olevel-result They are all members of the $99 Club, always looking for the last $1 dollar to round it up to $100 , they can never be satisfied. 

Look at my other people in Europe, despite the fact that they don’t sleep in Churches like your children do, they are kind to one another, their laws and polices are humane. They are not as greedy as your children are. Did n’t you live in the EU at some point

Me: I did Baba mi

Baba God: Did n’t you use to collect Child Benefit, Unemployment allowance, housing allowance, smog allowance…

Me: I used to, Baba mi

Baba God : Have you ever collected any of such in your country?

Me: No sir, Baba mi.

Baba God: Are those countries as blessed as your country, do they have oil and all the other resources?

Me: No sir Baba mi.

Baba God: After committing all sorts of atrocities, your children will be praying and sleeping in churches and mosques, they will be going on holy pilgrimage

My eyes are not blind that I cannot see neither are my ears deaf that I cannot hear. Tell your children I answered their prayers a long time ago. They should get off the line and give other people a chance so that I can answer their prayers too.They should put an immediate stop to Owambe politics and address issues as it is done in other countriesphoto (14)buhari-osinbajo-tinubu-apc They should go out and start doing good to their fellow brothers and sisters. They should stop stealing, lying and cheating,they should stop lying about their credentials, by the way what is this thing about your children and fake certificates? There seems to be none of them that has genuine credentials, they should do unto others as they would want others to do unto them. If they seek power it should be to serve and only to serve and not to amass wealth at the expense of their other brothers and sisters,and not to oppress their brothers and sisters.photo (13)

Me: Thank you sir, I give you all the praises, glory and honour sir, You are greater than the greatest sir, You are mightier than the mightiest sir, there is none like you sir…….

Baba God: That is enough,it is true that I inhabit the praises of my people but I am beginning to get suspicious of praises from Naija, they might be forged praises as well. Ask your children especially the men of Me amongst them, have they forgotten my prophets of old, like Elijah, Elisha, Amos, Isaiah, Micah etc? I expect them to do likewise, tell them that “Agba ti o kehun soro, a ketan sare‘ I put them in positions of  spiritual authority over your other children not only to stand in gap  and to pray for them for them but to also serve as  guardians to them, to warn them when they are derailing, tell them to do less of  attending weddings of adopted children and naming ceremoniesjona adeboye wedding and to desist from  asking for pardon for some of your corrupt children who were heads of banks that have stolen money entrusted in their care to pay tithes, I have rejected those tithes if they must know.

Me: But Baba God, You cannot do this, You cannot reject…… Then I heard a loud noise…. ‘Uuuuup NEPAAAAA’……

Then I woke up…It was a dream, I have been dreaming….NEPA just ‘brought light’.

Emm,  Come o, did n’t Jona say he will sort out our electricity problem by 2011? photo (16)

ME: (Hissing) Mtsheeew,  Yeye children, what kind of children are these gan sef. They want to put me in trouble with Baba God.

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See the #fireworks I created by blogging on #WordPressDotCom. My 2014 annual report.

See the #fireworks I created by blogging on #WordPressDotCom. My 2014 annual report..